He's just not that into u

Ok...so of course I had to go see this movie. This movie was hella funny...I mean I was dying. I agreed with the movie in quite a few instances. I actually took a few notes, which is hella funny in itself. I definitely think it's a movie worth seeing so I will try not to tell the whole thing...lol. But no, I really want to add a bit.

Sooo...you would think that everyone would know when a person isn't really into them. But, I think it's a bit confusing these days for some folks.



-Ignoring phone calls
-Person being rude to u
-Dogging you
-Dodging you
-Never returning phones

I'm sure there are many more tale-tell signs of it. And I think women especially concoct amazing excuses as to why men act the way they do. In the movie, I really felt this held true. In the movie the chick would just make millions of excuses as to why the guys she liked would dodge her or treat her badly. I have tons of girl friends that do this and I know I find myself doing this also. Once you get over the person and you look back at the situation it's amazing the BS that you put up with.


Some scenarios:

He/She cheated on you: I caused this b/c I didnt do ______ (fill that in)

He/She is rude b/c: I irritate him.

He/She is in the process of a divorce (gotta love that one)BTW what the hell is a process of a divorce..your either divorce or married..there is NO in between!!!!

He/She hasn't call yet...oh they must be busy...(hmmm that is always funny)

Haven't hard from that person for a while (think about it)


How long will you wait for this person to be the person that you want? How much BS are you willing to put up with? How long will you wait on the divorce, some respect, or even a phone call? We all have our tipping points...our pt when we say enough is enough and we keep it moving. Sometimes this is a swift process and sometimes this can take forever. And you wish u can move on and sometimes ur in denial of thinking that u have moved on.

Anyways...getting off topic (Was I ranting on about myself....hmmm). If a person hasn't called u back in say the usu 2-3 day grace period of giving out the phone number, then he/she's probably not that into u. I, personally, will forget a person in a wk's time..w/ no problem. Not even think twice about it...well maybe if the person was like a 12 on a 10 scale.

I'm gonna tell you guys something that my girl told me. This breezy (Bay area word) was so harsh and she made me cry when she was brutally honest with me...I'm gonna share her "reality checking" words with u guys..

Ok here goes....

- "If he loved u he would change, so obviously he doesn't give a f***"

- "He doesn't love u, he doesn't like u, and he could give a rats a** (I added that last bit)"

- "Move on"

Her telling me that worked..I figured why was I all sad and bent out of shape for someone who could care less. I'm the one stressed, My days r shitty, and he's the one going about his business having a great time.

From the words of my friend J: "he's just not that into you" (said before the movie came out..lol)

I'm gonna end with that...I'm sad all over again

Communication Technology: Friend or Foe

So, I've always thought that technology was the greatest thing in the world...and I still do, ummmm kinda sorta, sometimes. Anyway, the idea of living long enough for our world to merge with the Jetson's has always been a dream. I mean flying cars, messages sent over heliogram, and teleporting where ever you want to go. Sounds tight to me...we're not even close to that and I'm getting thoroughly annoyed with the communication devices we have now...

Let me get to the issue at hand

What is wrong with ppl text messaging like the verbal communication and actually seeing a person is a bad thing. Ppl have gotten so wrapped up in texting that refuse to talk on the phone and have full drawn out conversations over texting and it's quite annoying. I don't want a relationship that doesn't involve picking up the phone or a visit.

-Telling a person you miss them over text is cute ONLY IF you say in person also.

-Telling someone how they make you feel is not a text only event

-Breaking up with someone is not a texting event (lol)

-Trying to get the booty is not a texting event.

Ppl need to grow up and get a life. Texting should not ever be your main form of communication I don't care how far your significant person or even friend lives from you. It is rude to limit that person to texting only.

I think that it's sad that texting has allowed ppl to not conform issues or even to open up to ppl. Talking out your feelings and emotions is extremely important to grow as a person and a relationship and it would be a damn shame for ppl to use technology to substitute real life relations.

If a person can only tell you something over text messaging then it has a great chance of being ABSOLUTE BULLSHIT!!!

Men!!! Here's a Clue...

After talking to many of my guy friends and my own rough (nice way of phrasing) experiences with men, I have realized that men really don't have a SINGLE clue about women. I mean this is 2009 and most men have had their mother's in their lives and still they are completely obvious. It simply amazes me. So, I'm gonna take this time to give men just a bit of help. I figure something is better than nothing.

SO, here we go...men please pay attention and women please feel free to add anything that I may leave out.

1) If your interested in a woman, speak to her. Don't send your boy, don't stare and yet say absolutely nothing, don't wait years wishing you had spoken, and if you did wait years u would find out she had a crush on u all along but was hoping that you would speak to her. (Whew.. a mouthful already!!)

2) Learn to be appreciative. Remember that your not guaranteed anything and that everything she does for you is truly because she cares about u. As soon as she feels like your taking her kindness for a weakness she will stop doing what she does that you like "Oh so very much". Or if she starts to feel that you EXPECT her to do it, she will be irritated that you expect it. A simple "Baby, I really appreciate when you do...., ur amazing". LOL something like that. Appreciate how she turns heads, appreciate how she treats u, appreciate how she goes out of her way for u (when she doesn't have to), appreciate meals, appreciate presents, and appreciate that she's your girl AND NOT the next dude.

3) RESPECT HER!!! I'm thinking this should've been first, but keep in mind this is in no order of importance...it's all important..lol. So, respect..so much could be said. Respect her how u would respect your mom or how u would want someone to treat your mother/sis/daughter. If you treat those ppl crappy, then in a realistic world, it's gonna be difficult for you to treat your woman any different..and you might need a bit of therapy...just a suggestion. Respect her time, respect body, respect her intellect (just a few)!!

4)Learn how to simply agree to keep the peace.
Ok..so women get frustrated, annoyed, bothered, sensitive (sometimes hypersensitive), irritated and sometimes we simply just don't want to be bothered..and it may seem that these all mean the same things, but for a woman it really does have very different meanings. I understand that for a man that this can be quite confusing and probably overwhelming at times. A piece of advice: agree without sounding like your patronizing her, apologize if your annoying her (remember she could simply be annoyed by your present or even just anyone's presence...sorry),
ask if she needs anything or if u can help in anyway, maybe buy her a massage or spa day (you can do this whenever, so this is not limited to these moments only), or just stay away, while reminding her your here for her. There you go men.

5) Take care of your woman. When I say take care of your woman I don't mean you have to buy her crazy lavish gifts when u kno good and well ur on a tight budget. It means letting her know she's appreciated. This is a really big one men. I'm gonna try to break this down big time

- A simple text/phone call (PHONE CALLS R USU BETTER):

I was thinking about u.
I saw something that reminded me of u
I miss u
I hope ur day is going great
FYI: if you do too much already over text then u need to stop, we need to take it old school..pick up the damn phone!!

-Get her nails/hair done

-Dinner (at home or out)

-A picnic

-Something unexpected

-Something thoughtful: I will give an example of this. So one year for Valentine's my ex did something so amazing and extremely memorable. This was during track season and my coach wanted me to lose some weight, I had to cut back on sweets. So, for Valentine's day he made me a box of chocolate box (I hope that makes sense)..like a heart box out of cardboard box, spray painted it red and everything..it was huge, like half my body. It was so perfect and he filled it with track goodies: beef jerk (which I love for meets), all types of snacks, and a coloring book w/ crayons for traveling. It was amazing. I loved it and cherished it. It was by far better than any jewelry or anything else I have EVER received..it came from the heart...all mushy and stuff huh..lol


So, guys this was just a bit on insight....I hope that is was helpful. REMEMBER MEN: What you won't do, the next man will..Know when you have a Dime and Learn how to treat her/Keep her!! 80/20!!!

Ladies like I said before feel free to add more. Men if you have more questions simply ask..MUAH!!

My dreams Have been crashed!!

I'm gonna keep this short and sweet. I feel like someone just rained on my parade...killed my pet...told me Santa isn't real..

My girl just told me that my husband that doesn't realize it, has a baby. If you don't know who I'm referring to, I'm talking about Dwight Howard. I feel like I could cry. Like I'm dead ass serious. Damn!!!! What in the world. I mean are there no yummy 6'10 fine ass ever Men left...I mean goodness.

6'1 or taller
Yummy
Great bod
Athlete
Getting his "Obama-on"
care about his lady

I don't think that is too much...DAMN!!! I really wanted him.. I really am pouting over here...I gotta get off here..I gotta be alone..DAMN

Love VS Lust

So...I've been doing more thinking. I was thinking that boy there seems to be a fine line between lust and love. I mean you feel all tingly all over, you love being around that person, and of course it's probably the best sex ever.

The question becomes: is the sex making you feel all tingly all over or is it that you really love this person. Im of course not talking about myself...lol...remember I'm single now..lol.

So of course I did some research of the real definition of the two from Answers.com:
Lust: Intense or unrestrained sexual craving.
Love: A deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward person, such as that arising from kinship, recognition of attractive qualities, or a sense of underlying oneness.


I can see that a nice lengthy definition was given for love and surely not for lust. I'm sure that all of us have felt a bit of lust. I know I have...We all sinned in the eye's of God...lol

How do we figure out the difference and act accordingly. Well, I've been trying to think of my own version of a definition for lust and love which would be clear and concise and hopefully we can all steer clear

Lust:
1) if all u can think about is this other person's famous moves.
2) it's hard for u to think of this person outside of the bedroom (big prob)
3) the person can only be attentive when they're being pleased (bigger prob)

Glad none of that has EVER happened to me

Love:
1) you want so much for this person
2) you would put them before yourself
30 you think about this person, their well-being daily, and even their family

I definitely had a bit of that..

I think only time can really tell between the two. Oh once again we all have to be patient.

Men Trouble

So...I know it's been a super long time. I've been debating writing about whats been on my mind, but whatever. So, I always want to write about men probs...lol. I just get so irritated with men. I could like slap all of them...

So, I am recently single. No fault of my own..lol, at least I don't think so. I'm laughing when I write this, but I'm really serious. I've never read the book "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" or something like that, but I think I agree, because it seems like men are simply out of the loop about women. Like you would think that they never had a mother or a sister or anything...I mean damn...Goodness!!

Whoa...I feel better already..

So, my ex had the problems of being inconsiderate and rude. I don't believe he thought he was, but I've consulted with a few men and women and I'm pretty positive now..some situations were rude. I mean if someone is cooking u a meal out of the goodness of their heart, you shut up and eat..then later make suggestions...

BTW my cooking is freaking gourmet and I don't want this to be mistaken as me not being able to throw down.

But anyway that is over....Which leads me to another whole can of worms....

How do you get over an ex??

I mean there are sooo many things that have been suggested like dating, take a break, deleting numbers and all form of communication (which I do), but which one really works??? I was wondering if anyone had any suggestions. I'll be good for like a couple of wks then he will re-surface and mess everything all up...I felt like I was in "2 Can Play that Game" and he did the whole transference of energy shit on me..lol. Back to the drawing board!!!

My girl told me something so helpful..."If he loved you, he would change...since He hasn't change then there's your answer."

Such a harsh reality....

But I wanna put this out there since my birthday is coming up on Feb 16...I'm being perfectly clear...but anyways..I want Dwight Howard for my birthday...AND I accept birthday presents year around so don't feel bad if you miss the exact day..


MUAH!!!! Love you all!!